September 30th, 2024 (Monday)
The season four contestants of Disventure Camp were revealed on Twitter. Here's my first impressions of them from a few days ago without reading the casting call.
Alessio: A snobby artist or wannabe musician.
Logan: Frat boy???
Richard: Someone's dad who coaches the neighbourhood soccer team and gets bullied by high schoolers.
Ivy: There's probably gonna be some Sad And Tragic Backstory™ on why she has short hair. Or she's LGBT, Idk.
Tristan: I was gonna say they gave the goth/alternative guy enby his their name literally means "sad". I have no idea if that was on purpose.
Zaid: I don't have any opinion on him but I'm assuming he, Ivy, and Tristan become friends?
Amelie: An office employee who's also kinda bitchy. I think she might be an antagonist.
Hannah: She looks a lot happier than the other contestants. That's all I got.
Isabel: I remember seeing her silhouette in the original announcement image and thinking she was wearing a hijab or something similar. I have a few predictions for her:
- She gets voted off early because she doesn't get along with other contestants or isn't super useful in challenges.
- She sticks around for a bit but starts doing things that go against her faith and it becomes a character arc for her.
- She pulls a Miriam and makes it to the final three by being the least threatening contestant.
I have no idea how Disventure Camp is gonna handle an openly religious contestant, but my expectations aren't very high. I would LOVE to know Fiore's opinion on Isabel.
Anastasia: Just like Amelie, she also looks mildly bitchy and might be an antagonist. Comically pale.
Marissa: Military girlie who gets the Eva and Axel treatment (voted off second for being too intense, despite having a lot of skills that would be useful in later challenges).
Spencer: Probably becomes "friends" with Diego and doesn't care about him at first, but warms up to him over time.
Diego: Some type or safari/wilderness/Steve Irwin guy who's also kinda daft?
Jade: Stuck with Spencer and Diego and doesn't know how to handle it. It's also cool seeing a character with vitiligo.
Benji: Why does he look like my brother.
Ted: Snobby banker with the same body as Ripper.
Natalia: Is either season one Grett 2.0 or is perfectly normal, nice, and well adjusted. No inbetween.
Lynda: 1950s or 1960s housewife who was teleported to a reality show and doesn't know how to handle her current situation.
(Writing below is from current day Yossy)
I'm not gonna bother predicting the elimination order because it's gonna be egregiously wrong. It would be funny as hell if Isabel, Richard, and Ted were the final three though.
It's nice seeing more fat contestants, I REALLY hope they're not all total assholes or absolutely disgusting.
October 25th, 2024 (Friday)
Happy almost Halloween! I'm updating this entry because new art and descriptions of the new cast have been posted. Here's more of my thoughts. Sorry if I sound a little nonsensical and use the same four words over and over again, my brain is fried from sleep deprivation :)
Alessio: The line about him preferring "to stay under the radar" makes me think he makes it to the merge. Potential antagonist.
Amelie: She's probably an antagonist who gets voted out mid- to late-merge. I saw people saying she looks like Kamala Harris but I don't see it??
Anastasia: She feels like a pre-merge elimination and another potential antagonist. I know this sounds mean, but the updated art style makes her lips look weird. The highlight, rounder shape, and bigger size make it look like she has way too much lip filler.
Benji: I think he's an early boot. He'll convince everyone he's smarter than he really is, only to fuck up catastropically. I'll eventually draw Benji and Drew wearing this shirt since they're both French Canadian:
Diego: His chest is fucking massive??? He's definitely making it to the merge, maybe the final three. Possibly into men, even though I have no evidence to support this.
Isabel: Watching everybody panic over her possibly being Julia 2.0 was...interesting. I don't think Isabel's gonna be a twist antagonist?? It feels too predictable and really sus??? I have NO idea when I think she'll be eliminated or if she had a chance at winning because I also have no idea on what the show's gonna do with her.
Logan: He's probably making it well into to the merge or final three if nobody fucks him over.
Also, shoutout to this comment on his post for indirectly teaching me that "water sports" is also slang for sex acts involving urine:
Lynda: Yeahhhh she's gonna be an antagonist. I look forward to seeing her :3c It wouldn't surprise me if Lynda makes it to the final three, but it would be funny if she got eliminated pre-merge because she's a failwife who fucking sucks at reality game shows, despite being a fan of them. How much are you willing to bet that she's married to another woman and it'll be the only lesbian representation in this season?
Marissa: Based on her description and the animators having to give her shirt sleeves because she was taking too long to animate, I don't think she's getting the Eva And Axel Treatment™ anymore. Probably an early-merge boot.
Natalia: I think she could be a pre-merge or mid-merge boot depending on how liked she is?
Richard: Definitely a pre-merge boot. He'll probably become friends with Logan since they're both into sports coaching.
Spencer: This man looks like he'd call me a slur I've never heard before. I think he'll make it mid- to late- merge, Idk about the final three.
Ted: I wasn't expecting him to be a poker player. He's probably an antagonist who gets eliminated either by driving everybody away or somebody managing to outsmart him. I don't think he'll be an early boot though. May or may not have a rivalry with Lynda, depending on how far they both make it.
Tristan: Despite them being a fashion student, the fit does NOT go hard. I can respect the jewelry, painted nails, studded belt, and boots, but what the fuck is up with the hoodie and vest combination? Tristan's design is all over the place, tbh. I'm not entirely sure what's going on with their hair and they look older than eighteen because of the raccoon eyes and cheekbones. LOVE the new tooth gap though. Idk about their elimination ranking, I need to eat before I pass out for twelve hours.
I don't have any noteable opinions or thoughts on Hannah, Ivy, Jade, and Zaid. Seeing people get excited over Hannah being Filipina was really sweet though.
November 23rd, 2024 (Saturday)
Ignore the casting call lines I previously mentioned, they're not canon. Anyways, here's my final entry for this page now that all the audition tapes are out.
- "Why have I relocated to Australia? Next question."
- Goofs and gays aside, I don't think Anastasia's a spy. That feels a little too predictable.
- I get jumpscared every time I see a Total Drama or Disventure Camp character at a front angle. At least the side angles look fine.
- "Yes I care for my looks, but who doesn't?" I haven't touched my eyebrows in almost three years. They are disasterously uneven.
- "I've been a professional poker player for ten years" That is the LEAST fuckable career option.
- His nose looks sooo crooked at a front angle. Literally everything else about his face is okay, it's just his nose.
- I now headcanon Ted as Ripper's dad. The same guy that dropped all four of his kids when they were babies but two of them turned out fine.
- "I don't know what this show is" Damien moment. She probably isn't anywhere near as big of a spaz though.
- You can tell he's Canadian because he's a bronze medalist—*gets shot and dies*
- "What's good, y'all?" Are you from Texas??
- He sounds way...peppier? Than I expected.
- Zaid is either new to the job or an impostor because he is WAY too cheerful to be a sous chef. If I encountered him on the street and he didn't fucking reek of cigarettes, I would be VERY disappointed.
- I can respect him wanting to buy a house for his mom. That's a noble pursuit.
- Why are they so scary at a front angle.
- Perky goth???
- Tristan's voice is also way peppier than I expected.
- PLEASE drop your workout routine.
- "I wanna win Disventure Camp the honorable way" This might come back to bite you in the ass, Marissa. Just a warning!
- Okay I need captions for this one, I can't understand everything she's saying.
- I had to look up what "despotic" meant and oomph. Getting some sinister girlboss energy.
- "I can persevere through even the most unorthodox of situations" Me acting like I'm not on the verge of tears because I can't find Hot Topic in the mall and I have limited time.
- Amelie's a wedding planner? I saw people saying she was a corporate attorney but I guess not???
- Some bridezilla has definitely written angry Reddit or Facebook posts about Amelie at some point.
- Ngl she's kinda hot.
- He looks NOTHING like my brother. What was I even thinking.
- Please don't fucking wink at me.
- "My biggest advantage will probably be my extensive pop culture knowledge" Die.
- Benji is in law school. He could go on to defend somebody in a criminal trial, be a legal representative in a class action lawsuit, or answer questions on r/askalawyer. I don't like any of these possibilities.
- "We live in a society" STOPPPPPPPP
- Does Benji Hattori is gay?
- No. Benji will not be the winner.
- "...And the person to call if you need to have your public image fixed" Riya, come get your girlie.
- Who's Olivia Pope?
- "Your show kinda needs me with all the twinks you've almost killed" Thank you Natalia, very informative.
- I feel like most contestants don't go on the show to deliberately cause collateral damage? It just kinda happens?
- You know how Aiden didn't tell anyone he's trans until the show was almost over? Is Natalia gonna do the same?
- I WILL go scorched Earth if she gets outed.
- (From the "reception" part of her Wikipedia page) "Olivia Pope has the messiest personal life of any character in prime time. And that’s why you’ll probably fall in love with her..."
- Mother. Meemaw.
- She's interviewee #2? Did she refresh the page over and over until auditions opened? That's some commitment.
- "I'm 51" She should be at the club.
- Oh no, she's a boy mom.
- Do you think Lynda's ever seen the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota?
- That is a really creepy face. Please stop making it.
- STOPPP YOU LOOK LIKE THE GRINCH
- I've been waiting for this moment...all my life...oh lord.
- You had the chance to make her audition #666 and you didn't? I know 999 is 666 if you flip it 180 degrees, but it's not the same.
- Isabel took her sweet time applying for an audition if she's interviewee #9991.
- The organ music in the background afkjghlkjfgdhflgk
- IT'S SO FUCKING LOUD
- I'm pretty sure at least 5% of Isabel's followers are trolls.
- "People will underestimate me, I'm quite aware. Truthfully, I hope they do" Understandable, she probably wants to lay low.
- "They will be as lambs, flocking to me either as their shepherd or to the slaughter" That uh. Took quite a turn.
- "No matter the outcome, may God forgive me" Ominous.
- Okay, she sounds like she's actually participating in this season and not just "here to spead her message." That's good.
- One question: What's Isabel doing with the money if she wins? Nuns are supposed to take a vow of poverty. Is she donating it or is it just going to the church?
- Do you think Isabel's ever watched Rappin' For Jesus? (Very offensive language warning)
- Why the fuck is Justin Trudeau in my recommended videos. Go away.
- Haha nerd.
- His accent feels weirdly fake. Alec was a sussy baka but at least his accent sounded genuine.
- "I doubt there could be a single twist in the gameplay that would throw me off balance and stop me from claiming that prize" I could easily trick Spencer into running off a cliff like he's Wile E. Coyote.
- If my computer was cooperating, I'd photostop Spencer holding a gun and Isabel holding the Communist Manifesto.
- This happened right after I typed "Isabel holding the Communist Manifesto":
- Update: My computer cooperated.
- "But I have a daughter and husband who are chaotic messes" Sasha from Harvest Moon ghostwrote this.
- "I'm here to slay" No, you're not.
- Did she have an accent for a few seconds and then lose it?
- "There's no "I" in team. But there IS one in traitor!" —Message of the Week, Animal Crossing: Wild World (2005)
- Goddddd I'm so fucking tired. Damn you missing Vyvanse dose. Why's notepad auto-capitalizing Vyvanse? john. bob. Hezekiah. Okay it doesn't capitalize every name BUT it capitalizes Hezekiah and Vyvanse. Xanax. Strange.
- Disventure Camp gave us our one (1) crumb of lesbian representation by giving Jade two moms. Incredible.
- I'm guessing Jade makes a couple good friends and a fuck ton of enemies. Probably not by being mean but by being a good player.
- Why was her audition so short?
- His arms look really short? I forgot how wide his chest is.
- Another suspiciously short audition tape.
- Uncomfortable fact: Diego's original voice actor, Griffin Puatu, was fired for previously defending another VA who admitted to abusing former colleagues, friends, and girlfriends (here's a Tumblr post from one of them). Despite DC's voice director doing background checks on all the voice actors, they somehow missed this and didn't know this until after Griffin was announced as Diego's VA.
- Lighthearted fact: Kolani, Diego's new voice actor, did "some Mario-esque twink latino theatre boy thing" in his original audition because he didn't know what Diego looked like and "just shot based on vibes". The second audition obviously went a lot better.
- His tattoo looks very sun damaged.
- HE'S ALMOST THE SAME AGE AS JERMA???
- You better back the fuck up before you get smacked the fuck up.
- "I don't have the easiest time connecting with people" Me irl.
- I wonder what he thinks of Pasqually.
- Alessio's either an early boot or narrowly missing the final three.
Some additional predictions:
- Jade and Natalia make it to the merge. Ivy is a pre-merge boot. I'm still undecided on Hannah, Tristan, and Zaid.
- Lynda has a comically shitty marriage.
- Marissa quits.
- Spencer or Tristan get medically evacuated.
- Ted returns in a comeback challenge.
- Some kind of relationship or significant interactions between:
- Alessio and Amelie (Middle aged Europeans probably going through a midlife crisis)
- Anastasia and Marissa (A model who's also a beauty queen and a muscle lady in a male-dominated occupation...there COULD be potential)
- Benji and Spencer (Please kill each other)
- Hannah and Tristan (Canadian
idiotsteenagers) - Lynda and Ted (Woman trying to trick everyone into thinking she's harmless VS man who's obsessed with reading tone and body language)
See y'all in a week or so!